Friends, it’s become apparent to me that, to create a popular website there are certain things you must do and there are certain things you should never do.
I guess the cardinal rule is to accept that humans are herd animals and they do not like anyone who strays from the herd, who does things differently, who thinks differently, who challenges the status quo. Such a person is seen as a threat, one that must be resisted then, if they persist, driven away or ignored.
The following is a list of dos and don’ts. It is not comprehensive but it will do for starters:
1. You must tell people what they want to hear. This means selecting who you want your target audience to be then making sure that you feed that group a continuous flow of comforting, approving words. For example, if your audience comprises members of Abrahamic religions, saying that God doesn’t exist will win you no brownie points at all and neither will advocating the shooting of all Holy Books or the relocation of Israel!
2. If you think that people are herd animals, never tell them that. Always make them think they are highly individualistic even if their behaviour demonstrates the exact opposite. For example, you should never suggest to most Americans that the mess their country is currently in has anything to do with flaws in either their Constitution or their nationalistic ‘education’ system. No, despite Bush, tell them their Constitution is perfect and they are, collectively, the best educated, most broad-minded, caring people on the planet (even if most of them have never left their country and couldn’t give a stuff about the rest of the world).
3. Always praise the capitalist system. Although global warming has revealed that capitalism has serious flaws, these anomalies should not be spoken about. Consumerism is in – sustainability is out! So even when, in the future, half the world is rendered uninhabitable by rising water levels and freak weather events, just pretend that nothing is happening and encourage people to go out in their SUVs and spend more!
4. Never, but never involve yourself in political debate. Accept that the herd is divided into two political groups: the workers and the exploiters and the twain shall never meet. If you must discuss politics, praise both sides equally. For example, just say that George Bush is a misunderstood genius or that Hilary has only ever thought of serving the poor and downtrodden or that Sharon and Cheney are true men of peace.
5. If you have grave doubts about some of the sociological changes that are taking place in our society, don’t say so! Accept that it is trendy these days to embrace strange relationships and unusual sexual activities and simply go with the flow. When events occur which shock you, like for example, ordaining female Bishops or that someone has a sexual preference for turkeys, just smile and offer congratulations to all and sundry. Accept that the holy books have been wrong all this time (as it seems have many other social taboos) and that what they say has infinitely fluid interpretations (like ‘thou shall not kill’).
6. Most importantly, don’t criticize war whatever you do. War make lots of money for selected people and what makes money in this world must always be exalted. Sure, innocent civilians get killed (it’s merely collateral damage) but you are not your brother’s keeper anymore. Not in this crazy world!
7. Never suggest that the world is crazy or that we are on a path to oblivion! Stating the obvious is a no-no. People want to think they live in an ordered universe, one based on justice and equality and caring and McDonalds and Coke and Hollywood, etc. You must cater to their dreams. Truth-telling is unwise and unwelcome.
I hope this helps and encourages you to get started. Before you know it, you’ll surely attract an audience of millions.
P.S. Keep in mind that, with commenting, you may spend lots of time commenting on other peoples’ blogs yet they may rarely leave a comment on yours. Don’t be disappointed. Some folk have a funny idea of what ‘give and take’ means!
somebody is cynical today
the most popular sites on technorati- are the geek sites. computer stuff and whatnot. then the left wing big bloggers. the right wing big bloggers are somewhere in the 40-50th range- so- i guess you have to be well versed in geek speak- or be on the ‘winning side’ 
independents need not apply.
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Hey, Betmo, you nailed it when you said, “Independents need not apply.” There is no place for them on the internet or in this world!
I guess I just have to learn to believe in a god again, to worship capitalism, to love conservative politics and weird sex, and accept that the traditional family is passe and there must always be rich people while most folk starve, get exploited, occupied, bombed, etc.
I’ll start work straight away! Thanks.
Cheers!
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Who wants to be popular?
I’ve been running from that since I was a wee lad, and it’s worse now that I’m “getting up there!” ; )
It’s a nice state to be in, and feels much better than the so called “normal.”
Here in the US, if you look at what’s becoming popular on the boob tube, anything mentally stimulating has to be searched for, but if you want to be an “idol” those programs are growing. My question is, who can sit still for more than a few seconds and care? ; (
Cheers!
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We humans are herd animals but that may not be a bad thing. It all depends on where the herd is heading.
If it is to greener pastures then go along. However, if the herd is headed over a cliff then it might be a good time to change affiliations.
Herding is one of nature’s more successful survival techniques. We humans would not have survived to this stage had we not “herded” into various social groups.
Herding is in our nature.
Even the big bad wolf runs in packs. A lone wolf will have a hard time surviving. The same can be said about lions. Without the pride a lone lion will have a very tough life.
We humans have this romantic image of the lone hero. This is just myth. Even Ann Ryan’s image of the lone strong willed king of enterprise is misleading.
No Industrial baryon can succeed without the workers and the many layers of management and supervision required to keep everything running smoothly.
The baryon may have a vision but it takes the “herd’ to achieve that vision.
This “leader” of the herd is where things have a tendency to fall apart.
All “herds” follow a dominate leader or group. The wolf pack has its alpha male, the lion pride has its king of the jungle.
If the leader or leadership of a herd or social group or nation is competent and has the best interest of the herd in mind then the herd can accomplish great things.
If not then, oh well…………………
If anything we humans should be looking to consolidate our many national “herds” into one large planet earth human herd.
No lone hero no matter how great is going to solve our growing human problems of over population, global warming, and destruction of our environment, etc all on their own.
The same can be said about any single human national herd no matter how great or capable.
The only way we humans are going to survive the next 100 years is to come together as one human herd with the objective of saving the planet in order to save ourselves.
I am not holding my breath……
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Problem is, David, that the herd, because of its leaders, is heading over the precipice.
The leaders, consumed by greed and blinded by power, can’t help themselves and the herd, used to being led, are largely unaware of what is happening.
I’m not holding my breath too!
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What you describe is TV!!, and alot of web sites. I did not have TV for several years and recently started the cheapest cable package. Wow, what a bizarre experience. I saw right thru all the news channels. Its amazing how TV celebacy can heighten awareness.
I finally saw my first (and last) episode of American Idol. I am basically keeping the cable for a few more months, so I can view the next 911 psy-ops on the Tube. Also, my cat likes the Animal Planet station.
The internet is great, but I believe it takes alot of Awareness and the ability to sift through all the mind control. The best tool the “establishment” has to counter the Truth is to keep everyone confused. Heck, I notice that two camps that would generally be in agreement are often at each others throats.
They like to use Confusion, Mind control, financing Both or all sides of any conflict, and they love to use:
Problem…Reaction…Solution. That’s their big one.
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Cat, the world is full of cunning manipulators all trying to fleece the gullible and the weak.
I wish it weren’t so but, sadly, wishing achieves nothing!
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I love Walmart. I love the low, low prices. I think that men and women should be married, but never same-sex, as that is an abomination to the sanctity of it. I think that war is not good, in general, but that the U.S. is always right when we launch a war, because we are the Good Guys, and we are only doing it to get rid of all the evil terrorists, and protect the world and our perfect Way of Life against those who would try and eliminate our freedoms. We only fight them Over There so we don’t have to fight them Over Here. America is great. This is why God blesses America, and doesn’t bless other countries. I like McDonald’s. I also think all the hoopla over gas prices is baloney, because it is just the normal fluctuations you have from time to time in a blessed free market. God bless capatalism! America rules. I like my Chevy Tahoe. All arab-types are terrorists and extremists. Christianity is the only true religion. America is a Christian nation, and we have the right to defend our Christian way of life against the evil-doers who would challenge it. I feel bad about the occasional civilian who gets in the way of our bullets Over There, but I know that God forgives us for these collateral damages, because He knows our True Purpose. Can’t make an omelet without breaking a few eggs. Lowes and Home Depot rule! George Bush may not be the smartest man in the world, I admit, but by God he sticks to his guns, and I admire that. That is a true American trait there, and you must admire it! God bless him.
/sarcasm off….
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Just love your comments, Demon!
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